11 replies to this topic

[muppet]

I'm a 50 year old woman (not some young babe) and am being stalked by a man that I met, briefly, while on vacation. He is from the other side of the country and has now turned up on my doorstep. Keeps phoning and sending emails and knocking on my door. I am following police suggestions. Their website says that the further the stalker travels, the more persistent they will be. This is not fun and may be downright dangerous. He has sent me long and crazy emails (stupid me STUPId ME !!!! - gave him my email address ... when I thought he was just a friendly, harmless guy ... and he knows my last name). It is a frightening experience and up until now I have been a pretty laid back, trusting type person. No more. M.

[SemiBizz]

Get a court order that says he can't come within 1000 yards of you. Wait for him to break it and have his butt thrown in JAIL. I had a similar instance. Had an old Girlfriend show up on my doorstep from the East Coast after I had broken it off with her. In her case, I politely explained to her why it wasn't going to work for me. She slept over in the downstairs bedroom and left the next day and I haven't seen her since. That was 15 years ago.

[muppet]

From what I've read, getting police involved and getting restraining orders can actually make your situation far more dangerous. One guy stabbed the restraining order to his former girlfriends chest .... one is not wise to make these already crazy people, even crazier (madder!) May it all end soon. M.

Edited by muppet, 02 March 2007 - 10:53 AM.

[maineman]

Just kill him. I'm sure the courts will take your side. mm

[colours]

If you reside in a concealed carry ( weapon) state , it would be a good idea to immediately take a defensive posture . If you are unfamiliar with handguns ,take the courses and train yourself . Apply for the concealed carry permit ( which will require the gun safety and shooting courses)and purchase a handgun. Consider a double action revolver ( such as a Ruger .357 magnum - 2" barrel as it will not jam ). My wife has that exact gun and it fits her hand very well.Train as often as possible because if you have to pull the weapon you do not want to hesitate or project fear. Educate yourself and become "street smart". As you read you will find out how easy it was for this guy to have tracked you. Public records of real estate ,utilities , and phone records are easily obtainable . This guy is dangerous and to assume otherwise will be at your own peril. Good Luck

[muppet]

I've got pepper spray ... don't think I could ever actually shoot someone. Besides, personal handguns are more often used against the owners than by the owners (not my opinion - but what the stats show). In any case, thanks for advice. I DO agree that he is dangerous - and completely delusional. There is NO reasoning with this type of person. They live in a different reality. M.

[colours]

Just remember that he views you as his PREY . Make it hard for him to access you .Change phone and email numbers .Hire someone ( private investigator) to run a thorough background check on this guy. You need to know if he is a felon and/or is on parole. Look for drug convictions also,especially involving cocaine or meth. Find out what he's been up to in the past five years . You might try to find some MACE , because pepper spray is at best marginally effective . If you have to defend yourself , the last thing you want is him getting up and coming after you. And again , Good Luck.

[colours]

One more thing . Consider owning a dog, if you don't already. A trained (Schutzhund) German Shepherd will not permit him near you and will protect you from any aggressive action. You will have to exercise him daily ( he will demand it), but would probably lay down his life for you. I would not consider a puppy but a trained ,adult male dog.

[Rogerdodger]

I'm very sorry to hear about your trouble. Lot's of famous people have this problem and it can be most upsetting. The guy obviously has an emotional disturbance and you can't use reason with such a person. Motion lights and a security system with a loud panic alarm inside and out may offer some comfort. A gun won't do most women any good if they are not determined to use it. Moving, at least temporarily, may help. Best wishes.

[Tor]

Just ignore him. Dont reply to text and if he turns up dont speak to him. No need to reject him as just, just let things pass I would say, they usually do.